What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
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