with your own penis?
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
He just got dropped off drinking a flask, sitting on the handlebars of a chinese delivery man's bike
Tonight's gonna be epic. Did he bring my noodles?
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
