So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
false alarm, still single
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
