called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize