do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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