Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Randomize
