Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
I am drunk as shit eating pancakes. I am not the person to call.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
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