I want to make a zoo with you.
At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
birth control should be required to get into college
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Randomize