We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
