i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
so I smoked with the leasing agent of the apartment complex. Of corse I am going to take this one
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
