I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Thank god crabs can't live on your head. Thank god.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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