dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
every Thursday i draw one of my friends names out of a hat to choose who i will drunkenly text all weekend
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
