We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
And then I realized my chick friends consist only of sober you, drunk you and hungover you
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
