the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
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