My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
Randomize
