Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Interesting fact: if you wanted to rename a guy Jeff, just tell him you only fuck Jeffs. Magically whatever name he was using is actually his middle name cause he doesn't like going by Jeff.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize