her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
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