Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
Randomize
