it really sends the message that i like to impregnate mortal women and have them birth fantastic half man-half god infants.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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