So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Right now I'm standing in front of my fridge, drinking wine out of the bottle and eating cold steak with my hands. I am THE BEST at being single.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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