best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
