Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
It's never too late to be topless.
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
Randomize
