"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
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