just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
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