im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
Randomize
