I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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