i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize