No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
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