Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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