i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
