One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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