My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
