absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
