Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Pants-less sunday? Also I'm high and independence day is making me cry
im coming over
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
