What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
