He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
