Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Dont eat ANYTHING off the floor at Matt's house. He likes floor sex.
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
Randomize
