wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
