You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
