Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
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