I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
