she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
He's ruined me. Do you know how frustrating it is to know I'll never find another guy as tall and handsome and rich with as big of lips & booty, and cock as him who also rims and takes me on tropical vacations and buys me all the cocaine.
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
Randomize
