Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
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