I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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