That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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