is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
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