Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
okay pat passed out under dana's car
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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