They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
