how can u be prego again
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
