rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Holy shit dude........stairs
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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